yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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