I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
