ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
