Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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