I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Randomize
