Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
