I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize