I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
