just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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