In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
