You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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