Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
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