hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
