there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
so much tequila, so little girl.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I need a beard to bite.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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