then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
