Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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