i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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