people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
