Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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