Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
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