yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
