Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
