I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I think your dad took our porno
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize