so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Randomize