so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Randomize
