Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
