After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
