wakey wakey hands off snakey
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour