Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better

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(918): i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better http://tfl.nu/xhei

Replies (9) Good night (2894) Bad night (652)
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(952): View more from Minnesota

Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.

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(952): Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage. http://tfl.nu/guje

Replies (15) Good night (1059) Bad night (4270)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him

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(304): His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him http://tfl.nu/2mpu

Replies (15) Good night (3585) Bad night (2054)
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(705): View more from Ontario

APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...

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(705): APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk... http://tfl.nu/biv4

Replies (5) Good night (3765) Bad night (1055)
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(970): View more from Colorado

But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"

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(970): But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed" http://tfl.nu/2s0k

Replies (6) Good night (1182) Bad night (2757)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.

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(412): well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm. http://tfl.nu/hugj

Replies (10) Good night (5275) Bad night (1051)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.

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(608): She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism. http://tfl.nu/czkn

Replies (4) Good night (1857) Bad night (705)
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(806): View more from Texas

Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?

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(806): Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight? http://tfl.nu/jadi

Replies (6) Good night (3222) Bad night (935)
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(228): View more from Mississippi

He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"

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(228): He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good" http://tfl.nu/hwu1

Replies (33) Good night (6946) Bad night (1314)
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(218): View more from Minnesota

my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.

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(218): my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor. http://tfl.nu/6k19

Replies (2) Good night (1041) Bad night (473)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy

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(978): I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy http://tfl.nu/46h5

Replies (1) Good night (861) Bad night (368)
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.

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(484): So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest. http://tfl.nu/3leh

Replies (0) Good night (625) Bad night (357)
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(323): View more from California

I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?

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(323): I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today? http://tfl.nu/ws7y

Replies (2) Good night (679) Bad night (353)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him

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(832): i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him http://tfl.nu/ixz8

Replies (2) Good night (457) Bad night (235)
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(928): View more from Arizona

I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.

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(928): I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die. http://tfl.nu/wj6g

Replies (2) Good night (376) Bad night (226)

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