I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
