I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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