My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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