what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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