I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
In other news, I just burned my penis
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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