He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I'm sobbing to NWA
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Randomize
