I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
