the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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