About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
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