It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I'm too high and old for this...
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
