I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
