and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize