Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
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