i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
