Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize