I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
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Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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