508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
