so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize