I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
