hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
