i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
