lets start a swedish sibling band together
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
